Your Mother's Day Hill Gift Guide

Some moms still dig the flowers, you know. Peony photo by María Helena Carey

By now you probably know, Sunday is Mother’s Day. Advertisers would have you think that this is the only day when you are supposed to pencil in some time for mom. But, wrong: after all, this is the woman who bore you, bored you, adopted you, took you under her wing, and otherwise raised you to become the awesome person that you are today.

But what to get mom? Fear not! Here is where I come in with a sensible, no-fuss gift guide.

1. Sleep. You think this is a joke, don’t you? It’s not. All of us mothers have regretted deeply those anxious nights we stayed up pre-baby, reading What To Expect When You’re Expecting and worrying about the unknown. We could have used that time just sleeping and sleeping and sleeping because the next time we get to do something so simple is years from now. The first time I slept eight continuous hours after becoming a mother was more than four years later. I am serious.

2. Some time alone. Did you know that part of motherhood is the inability to go anywhere alone for more than 10 minutes at a time? This includes going to the bathroom. Actually, it starts at going to the bathroom with an entourage: you, the kid(s), toys, a snack — picnic (sometimes) and shrill noises that bounce beautifully off the tiles in the shower. The mom in your life needs some time alone even if it’s just 20 minutes to take a shower and put on some makeup. But really, you can do better. Book mom a nice date at a restaurant with someone who does not need assistance with their food. A romantic date would be ideal for most moms, but the truth is that some of us just want to savor a dinner where we don’t have to shout and remind our fellow diners of their manners. Give us a glass of wine and some food to eat. Or, maybe a movie where the characters are not drawn by hand or computer generated. Another suggestion? Book mom a nice, quiet room at a local hotel for a night of uninterrupted sleep and maybe a long bath that does not involve three back-to-back dramatic readings of  Thomas The Tank Engine Tells a Lie.

3. The knowledge that you’re thinking of her: So, you are making plans for Sunday, but you can’t get past your mommy issues enough to give her a call? Be a grown-up. Even if your relationship with your mom is tough, give her a call. If it’s truly beyond reproach, then you need some healing. If your relationship with your mom causes you pain, think of someone who has been there for you unconditionally with love and understanding and celebrate that person. Let them know how you appreciate their love and nurturing. If your mom has passed away, maybe it’s a good day to celebrate her love for you. It’s a good day to ponder on what motherhood means, no matter which stage of life you happen to be in.

And finally, just remember to be kind to yourself — your mom would want that for you too.